By Jarlath Burns

IT'S HARD as a GAA neutral, not to feel glum after watching last weekend's action. When your own team isn't playing, and the result doesn't really matter, what you want to see is good football, long range scores, nice goals, great catches and free flowing action. The menu was fairly mouth-watering with four derbies on offer. In fact, have we had a real good match in the championship yet? The answer has to be No. In Ulster, we saw about twenty minutes in Enniskillen, nothing in Celtic Park, fifteen in Clones and about ten in Breffni. And in Croke Park, the packed stadium, beautiful in blue, can hide a multitude in its splendour, but even that glamour couldn't disguise the muck that was on show. And in Killarney, more of the same turgid, fumbly stuff, littered with unforced errors and zealous defensive play.

So what is wrong? There are a number of answers to this question. Back before we began to think too deeply about the game, things were simple – Four men rose in midfield to catch the ball, for to break was seen as a sign of weakness and when the ball was won, there were only three others in that vicinity because everyone else was minding their own man and business. This left it easier to release the ball into the danger area and a big kick in the general direction would do because the typical corner back was slow and awkward and useless on a nippy forward.

And the players played their positions. Half backs defended, if not as diligently as the full backs and half forwards played off their full forwards and were chief play makers. But in the past ten or so years, that has all changed; possibly for ever. Now in the era of statistical analysis, forensic monitoring and counting of everything, we have achieved paralysis by analysis. Backs take five passes out of defence and will give it to a man standing right next to him rather than boot it down the field and take his chances. That's for fear that he might be named as 'the man who gave away the most ball' on the Tuesday night DVD session; which is a sort of 'Weakest Link' meets 'Russian Roulette' occasion. Half forward is possibly the hardest position to play in; not a midfielder, only a semi-detached forward and not really a defender either. In the modern game they don't appear to have a role, so it's music to a wing man's ears when he is told is to act as sweeper, since it gives him the freedom to define his own role in the match.

Now to midfield which has become a lottery since it was discovered that the breaking ball is a lucrative source of secondary possession. Even the term 'secondary possession' is evidence of the epidemic of jargon which has infected into the game. As the ball sails through the air from the kick out, it is awaited with the collective bated breath of four midfielders, two number sixes and 11s, a 15 and a 13 playing third midfield and their markers, number two and four. Twelve men in total.

This leaves that area an ecstasy of fumbling, as a mass body of testosterone, nerves and thighs rise in unison for the one thing and not all with honourable intentions. It can take ten minutes for the ball to emerge with any degree of integrity from the close quarters fighting that ensues and by that time, the half back line has been packed to the gills with half forwards looking to make a name for themselves. One of the statistics I like to take at matches is the number of catches, or possession won from midfield. If the ball breaks, I wait until one team has a firm hold of possession and has made at least one successful pass before I chalk it up as a 'possession won'. It can take up to five minutes in some cases for this to happen.

And what is the result of all this? Well lots of wides for a start because if a team is attacking in numbers, they do great until they reach the three quarter line where the life is then throttled out of the attack by a sea of defenders, midfielders and forwards, all of whom are using their new found greater fitness to close down space and slow, stop, strip, smother and support, the five S's of defence. And when they counter attack, we are treated to the sight of about fifteen men scampering after the ball, some to create, but most to stop.

So, here we are in the most advanced era of tactics, game plans and set pieces, yet it's back to the school playground approach where everyone follows the ball and nothing gets scored.

So what do we do, or do we need to do anything? Last year, there was a feeling that the era of blanket defence was coming to an end. Tyrone's new found style of all out attack coupling the shock and awe of numbers running at the defence with great length and accuracy from long range points seemed like the light at the end of the tunnel. But we have seen the blanket make a comeback this year with varying degrees of success and once again a one 100 percent poor quality rating.

The number of wides we have seen so far this year, and last weekend it was over 100 in the four matches, is indicative of men trying to shoot under pressure, or from an impossible angle. That or a defender who has found himself in the full forward line, drawn up there by a third man midfielder and looking like a rabbit caught in the headlights. Perhaps we could take a lead from the Aussies here and accept that the behind score isn't a bad idea and would offer something to a team which has attacked successfully to the point where they actually got a shot on goal.

There is a tremendous sense of deflation when we see yet another ball go wide and this can lead to despair about the state of the game in the post match analysis.

And while we're at it, I'd also go to a 13-a-side match, therefore doing away with the need for teams to hide a man behind midfield in order to create space for their forwards. But I wouldn't hold my breath for this to happen and while we continue playing the game as we do, there is even less hope of even one classic match from Championship 2009.